... Matt's Outtakes ...

some of the behind-the-scenes happenings in his previous videos. really funny!

... Where The Hell Is Matt? ...

he has finally finished his video. such an amazing video by such an amazing guy!

Kudos to you Matt!

Tagaytay, Philippines was included in his itinerary. Enjoy the video everyone!

... Dream Over...

i think the dream is over. the pursuit is over and he has found another to chase. the flavor of the month has ended. he does not even make an effort to look at my direction anymore. tsk.. tsk.. tsk.. nothing to see here anymore. it should not make much impact on me because i have prepared myself for this. so, why do i feel this pain in my chest? ... .. . . . . .

... unfathomable...

i feel like my heart is breaking but i don't understand it. if only things weren't so complicated. why does it feel like this? i can not comprehend this feeling. i know i'm an emotional person and i love giving love and receiving it. but, i just cannot comprehend this kind of love that you give to another, the one that you would potentially call your "significant other". its unfathomable for me. i dont understand it. or maybe i refuse to understand it. i'm so used to being single forever that i am not able to comprehend having another person "attached" to me. its a mixture of different feelings, of happiness and sadness at the same time; of elation and frustration. maybe, i would understand it soon, when i find the "right one" as they call them. only time can tell. right now, its confusing for me.

...frustrations and vacations...

living....

i am a bit frustrated today. i think its because of my being moody lately. i'm kind of getting restless again. i want to get out. i feel so confined. i feel like all eyes are on me (even though this is not true!). i think i'm a bit pressured now. or i'm just getting tired with what seems like routine for me already. i cant talk to our customers easily lately because i'm afraid of what i might say. i'm kind of getting sarcastic again. i take offense to even small things that are being said. although, i am still trying to be calm and collected. i have to because i might hurt someone or our store if i don't do that. i might react in a big way to petty frustrations and that's no good.

i want to do different things already but i am tied down to my obligations at the store. i started reading that numerology reading for me and it was kind of inspiring and kind of wearisome at the same time. but, i am okay with it. i just have to go with what life has been throwing me. i've been doing that my whole life. i need to get out soon or i'm going to burst!

living part two...

i just had my vacation a few weeks ago and i loved it. of course, it didnt go smoothly all the way. however, i still had a lot of fun in the sun! hahahaha.... we were in Boracay for 4 days and the place is still wonderful! gorgeous beaches, amazing sunsets and wonderful sun! i finally got my tan! yahoo to that! i've always wanted to have a tan again. i don't want to be pale-looking anymore. i'm tired of everyone telling me that i am so light-skinned (although they are telling this in a positive way.) i just wanted a change.

Again, Boracay was great! i'd love to go back there soon. but this time, i would like to go back there with my sis, bros and cousins so it would be more enjoyable.

dreaming....

that i am in Singapore now (which i will be in july this year), talking with one of my best friends, who relocated there a few months ago, chatting away and having a blast. laughing till our stomaches hurt, sipping some drink (coffee or something cold), doing some sight-seeing, shopping and eating and eating and eating! hahahaha.... (nah! have to watch what i am eating now).

*sigh*

Bored...

living...

i am just so bored. or maybe sleepy. or maybe tired. or maybe all of them. i have been at the store since 6:45am. and the time now is 7:05pm. i'll be here till closing time at 12:00mn because of stupidity. i totally forgot that i gave my cousin his day-off today. then i told my aunt yesterday that she can have her day-off today too. i totally forgot the date today. *sigh* so now, i have no reliever for the cashier. my mind is just going blank sometimes especially when it comes to dates. i need a rest soon.


dreaming...

i am dreaming that i am at the Spa on my birthday, being pampered and getting all those massages and stuff.... that would be totally relaxing.... haaayyy......

Headaches....

living....

my head is aching pretty badly earlier, but its subsiding now. i have been staring at the computer for about 2 hours. i have been surfing the net, browsing some news, checking my emails and other stuff. i'm kind of bored and at the same time, i'm still thinking about what some of our staff told me. it's sooooo disappointing! i'm so disappointed! i know its part of life and part of owning a business that you will encounter people, either customers or staff or suppliers and others, who are not trustworthy. i'm just so disappointed with this particular person because his work has been consistently very good. we trust him with one of our stations and with being observant of what's happening around our store. turns out, he has been doing some stuff behind our backs. stuff that are against our store policy and his attitude towards some of his co-workers is not that professional. i'll try to correct this but, it will all be upto him if he will accept his wrong doings or not and try to change for the better or not. he has toooo much pride to the border of him not noticing that he is already being hurtful to others eventhough he was the first one who started it. i am truly disappointed!

dreaming....

i am now dreaming or wishing that i am in Boracay already for that vacation that i very much need right now. i need a change of surroundings. i need to rejuvinate myself or this headache might not go away for awhile. i cant wait to go there already!